When to keep silent?
A complete understanding of yourself with the help of positive attitude towards you. The successful practice that makes one truely mature with out the feelings of compromise.
In life we often find ourselves in such situations where we regret our past actions. One of which is that we forget our nature and we speak something that we were not supposed to say. We become what we never wanted us to be to others, being cruel. But we are left with no choices rather than to regret our action in past. The thing is when we regret such things that are already said and done, we have to focus on what is causing us this problem. Everyone know that words said can not come back. There are some mature people who listens to the harsh words of others but stiill they forget all those. They just focus on their task. So they are successful. But there are people like us to who are soft hearted that never wants other suffer for our reason. We overthink and make our own life miserable. So When to keep silent?
Since I already stated that there are some mature people that are not affected of any harsh words of others. Here we have understand, how is that possible? What are the points that could be possible?
1) Is it because they have to listen to all such bad behaviour and harsh words but they could forgive all those just because they are super human.
2) Is it because they have no other options rather than to keep up with themselves to better focus on their work. That means for need to fulfill they have learnt to not react instead they suppress their feelings.
3) Is it that they don't have self-respect?
4) Is it that they got wise?
and so on...
All those could be true. The information we receive if we believe it as truth then it will become the truth, but only our version of truth. So, this is unversal, if we can accept what is gone is gone, what is said and done is also gone. Then why people like us suffer again. Now that we have come to this state that yes there are such mature people. So this means that we are not mature yet. We are either really not mature for not going through such experiences with a lot of people or we make same mistakes again and again b'coz we suppress our emotions and when we speak at such situations where you decided to speak and you spoke way harsh thing that could land to the buttom of others mind and thoughts like a rock.
Here the main thing we have to undestand is we are over thinking. Why it's overthinking? Just because now we know
1) it's said and done (not in my control)
2) mind is wasting time and energy [one that is supposed to be in control. Since we are fighting inside us for past action is at the buttom that is we lost control of our mind in past and now overthinking on that thing again wasting your time. Even more it will drain our energy since now we have negative force of regret.]
3) Since mind is busy thinking on all those we forgot to focus in what could be the right action to correct that mistake?
4) Is that even important to fix it first or first to settle down our mind?
So here we have understand and agree on settling down our mind. Addition to it, to settle down we have to learn to accept that mistake. When we find ourselves in such situations where our mind talks a lot, we overthink we have to write down the list of things to understand what is said and done. What are the plans to fix it if possible? Then we realise that fixing is needed for our settlement of our mind not for other's. So once when we start to write it down we will realize the anxiety is reduicing since the mind is busying focusing for finding out best cure for our problem. And when we write we are very very slow or we can say the frequency of our brain is different when we do task. Here, we have to understand that we are now in the state of doing meditation. So brain will start to work with calmness. Slowly we will find peace at that moment when we start to write those points well researched then that feels right to us. So now we go in the state of acceptance. Now we accept that what is said and done has already, that moment has gone.
So now we plan to fix the error. Here again if we don't want to fall in such trouble again then we have to make options to implement the fix. And here we will realize that our positiveness can help us find the options.
However, when to keep silent for next time? It is not necessary to find out the answer. Just keep on making mistakes and do this practice over and over. Here if you doubt yourself like that is like making same mistake again and again, am I not being fool? If you think so then simply tell yourself it could be. But now you are positve and you know how to calm your mind.
Finally one beautiful day when your practice of understanding our activities and mistakes and how you could drive yourself on that long process of settling down your stress by writing down lists (that is to control the frequency of your disturbed mind to a focusing mind to become calm) you will realise that moment. Then you will know that it is when to keep silent?
Always be patient to practice. Always be positve. If you sow a seed and nurture the soil and make the environment favourable for it's need then the plant has to grow anyway.
Please comment below how it works with you. I know you are one of a soft hearted person with a lot of love for your family and friends. So keep practicing and do comment your experience. Any updates and queries will be responded with pleasure.
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